Not even one flag

First off I would like to say... Happy Fall! "It's the most wonderful time of the year!" Secondly, I would to say... BLOODY FUCKING HELL. Now that I've got that out my system, I shall explain.

Yesterday. Monday. An increasingly evil day, as I get older, I've noticed. Funny how that works. Actually, I need to start with last Friday. I had a little "slip up" and joined this other dating site (why do I do that to myself? and to be fair, I have already deleted my account) and as usual, felt uncomfortable with it, but it was really late and I was just angry. I guess. This was on the 19th or something. Anywhore, Thursday night I start chatting with this guy - whose nickname will be Lt. 180. Friday I find out all my friends are meeting up at this gay bar we all used to go to when one of our other friend's worked there, so I thought 'why the hell not' and hopped online when I got home. If he was online, I would invite him out. If not, then no biggie. Well, he was and he agreed to come out. A little info on Lt. 180 right quick: he's one year younger than me (hence the Lt. bit LOL), 6 foot freakin' 5, never been to a gay bar before. So we all get to the bar and we're hanging out, drinking, smoking, the usual. I come outside and my friend Uh Oh (omg if you knew the story behind that nickname you'd be laughing and going straight to Hell at the same time!!) goes, "He's here." I said, "How do you know?" She said, "Because he pulled up, asked if I was ____ and where he should park." So I run around and tel all my friends (mostly gay guys other than Uh Oh) that he's here. Eventually he walks up and eventually we're inside and eventually I'm really getting the feeling that he's totally not into me. I ask him if he's really uncomfortable and he says yes. I ask him if he's uncomfortable enough to leave, and he says yes. I was a little shocked you could say. So we end up outside round the corner a bit talking and he asks me if I feel a spark. I say, "Well, I think I had an answer to that but judging by you asking me the question, I'm guessing my answer isn't the same as yours." He shook his head no. Then, thru a conversation drowned in 'I'm sorrys' and whatnot we start talking about being hopeless romantics. Which I am, which actually - apparently - led me to say some things he really understood, because he's one too. Not only do I know the way we think, but I have Crazy Brain Syndrome (copyright by ME... don't worry, you do not want to have it) as well. We talk and talk and I realized, and said to him actually, that I wasn't just disappointed because of everything I've gone thru with guys, but because there was just some reason that he was unbelievably cool to me. (Cliff note: he really made me laugh. He made me laugh to the point where I wasn't thinking about The One or anything else to make me feel horrible at the same time.) I guess I could shorten this up a bit... he ended up staying the whole night and he gave me some nice (albeit innocent) kisses towards the end (which ended up being 3:30 am). I'm really not sure how else to explain it or what else to say but I still feel a little bit like I forced this to happen by not just saying 'ok fuck you go away,' but then how strongly can we cling to the what ifs and still be sane? I don't know. We had an hour-ish long convo on the phone on Saturday and we've text a little and email a little during the day while he's at work. I'm not sure if it'll go anywhere, but, I think I'm quite glad that I know him. I think we could be friends.

Saturday. VBF (the gay guy who runs a certain show that they have at bars - damn all this being vague! lol)... actually, VBF is so not creative enough for him. So, his new nickname will be Vodka Man, which, if you knew him, is still not creative but oh well! Anywhore, Vodka Man called me and was all, "So, you're coming out tonight right? Right??" I wasn't going to. I had tons of crap to do and I had no extra money for food or drinks, blah blah. Vodka Man says, "No, no, you're going to come here, leave your car and drive with us. AND I'll get you some food. AND I'll come to your house sometime next week and cook for you." I said, "You still owe me a pop-in-chef visit for my birthday the year we met...like, 3 years ago." Vodka Man says, " Oh. Well, I'll still drive you and feed you. YOU'RE COMING." I agreed, duh. So we're there and one of our other friends came out (ooo, what to nickname him... "The Yeahmeister") and it was all fun and stuff. There is this guy who is a regular at Vodka Man's Saturday show, that Vodka Man told me he wanted me to meet. That was weeks ago, and I did meet him and it had been pretty obvious to me that nothing was gonna happen. He's cool and all but we never really talked and he always seemed to have to leave when I got there. But anyways, last night he was there and he was sitting at our table, so, being the awesome flirt that I am, I tore a piece of napkin, wrote "you're cute" with a smiley face on it and passed it to him. Yup. That's what I did. He wrote back, "Do you wanna go steady? Y or N circle one." LMFAO. I wrote, "You're mocking me. Ass." He wrote, "But I have my letter-man jacket waiting for you." It pretty much continued like that except for him saying that "of course he thinks I'm cute," that I "sing like an angel," and "what is your number?" Yeah, hello, he asked for my number. I gave it to him. Vodka Man vouches for him (not that friendly vouches haven't failed me in the past) so why not? Well, he totally hasn't called me. Granted, he may have been too drunk to remember what the fuck the notes were about, or even lost that one particular napkin. But, I mentioned it to Vodka Man the other day, saying I wondered if he was going to call. Vodka Man said, "He may, he may not. Don't worry about it is what I say." And while I almost always feel like Vodka Man is on my side, this time I just feel a little dissed. Like, he made this big deal out of the fact that there was to be this huge set up between me and Slow (nickname, ta da) and then I finally came out a bit, flirted, gave him my number, he isn't calling and I'm just supposed to be ok? I'm not, like, looking for flings here people. Stop messing with me.

Sunday. The weather Sunday night was retarded! We had tornado watches and an extremely intense thunderstorm came thru. Granted, it only lasted an hour at most, but it was pretty weird for the end of September. And the fact that every 5 minutes I got a weather text about tornadoes or something. I was picturing being woken up by the tornado siren, my power being out, having to find my cat in the dark, get her in the cage and run downstairs. Jesus, could I even think in that situation? Anywhore, by the time I got into bed everything had calmed down. Then my cellphone charger wasn't doing anything when I plugged it in, again. Then, it broke (which may have actually been Monday morning) so my phone is now - at the time I'm writing this - completely dead and I'm hopefully going today - Tuesday - to get a new charger. Monday night there was going to be some huge fair at my school and they decided to use the parking lot in front of the building it was in and the one in front of MY building (and not the lot on the other side, which was obviously logical). Which isn't attached. Which has nothing to do with the fair!! Some 5,000 people were to be expected so I went 45 minutes early to class... to find that the parking lot was maybe 2% more full than usual and so I was seriously early. Awesome. Then, we got out early (a break! NOT FOR LONG SUCKER!!) and it was pouring. So we all put on our hoods from our hoodies and I walked to my car in horizontal rain and flip flops. I first drove over to my parents because they had taped one of my Monday night shows for me (I taped my other) and found out their power had gone out so they couldn't tape it. That. Blew.

Oh, my god. So I think that's everything. Oh did I mention I missed my Monday morning class? Yeah, which means... well, nothing really, except that I just have to catch up with the one assignment which is no biggie because my program at home isn't working like the one at school (same program, yay technology) so my teacher is going to walk me thru it anyways... wow I sound really inept... But still. And I repeat, BLOODY FUCKING HELL. I'll be glad when this week is over. I have so much shit to do today, too, thank god I have no class. And now I'm pissed and hungry. "Holy Hell! Where's the Aspirin?" (10 pts if you know the movie)

UJ

Whoa-oh-oh

I'm seriously thinking about moving to Russia. And that's all I really wanted to say. Oh, that and I have a new obsession. His name is Chris Colfer.

UJ

Lonely

Ooo, bad us for not posting in a while! We've been busy little bees. Well, CB has definitely been busy with moving south (for the winter?) and I've been busy dealing with the stupidity of men. Haha. Not fully, but that's the first thing that popped into my head.

A little update for all one (apparently) of you who read our blog: I dumped Cpt. Stoneage a week ago. And if what I am about to say makes me sound a little like a vindictive bitch, so be it... but it felt pretty damn good. I was thinking this is probably for a few reasons. 1) My relationship before that is hard to explain. Check that, it's too long and too crazy to fill anyone in who wasn't along for the ride. I think CB would agree. But, when it came time for us to admit defeat, he got there first. We "dropped the title of boyfriend/girlfriend" and were "just dating." Whatever-the-fuck that meant. *rolls eyes* I will admit I was ok with accepting that confusing bit at the time because I still loved him. I still love him now. Very much. And I think I've said it before that it's still very possible he's the one. But... with everything we had been through, it was horrible for him to be the first one to say "alright that's enough," in good ways and bad. So, after going through that and then being utterly shocked, angered and put off by Cpt. Stoneage's complete disregard for, um, living, I was not at all hesitant to end it. I'd be disliking him more and more for weeks and when the last straw became a bundle of last straws I just had to stop myself and say, "Ooook, no more worrying about this douche bag. Done." 2) Going back even further to my divorce. I spent months trying to change whatever I could so the Asshole (have I mentioned that nickname yet? Well, that's his nickname) wouldn't leave. Or whatever. Course finding out on your 3 year anniversary that he's cheating on you - for me anyway - switches flips and leaves them permanently on or off. Love went off and anger went on. I guess I was the one who set the divorce in motion, but I had still tried so hard for so long to make it work. Guh, and you know, just re-hashing this in a blog kind of makes me wanna McVomit a little. (Oh, McVomit is what I use for barfing now... it stemmed from the nicknames on Grey's Anatomy. Yeah.)

Where the fuck was I going with that? Oh, so yeah, no problem breaking that tie. I kind of want to throttle his fat ass just for the hell of it, but, as my intelligence has reminded me before, he's not worth it. Most of them aren't. Plus, he's CB's friend and for HER SAKE ONLY I wouldn't want to cause any drama. Unless she'd be ok with it 'cause I really would love to whoop his ass. Hmm...did I ever give that other guy a nickname? Oh. I did. The One. Ha.

Wow, I am hungry. Do I want to eat now, or do I want to wait a few more hours and possibly go out to lunch and get the most amazing pizza in the world? Hey that's what snacks are for yeah? I didn't really have anything to post today, except for the little snippet of gossip. But in case CB still isn't quite e-settled, I shall return sooner rather than later.

UJ xxoo (I think I may drop the xxoo...it's a little too Gossip Girl for me...)

Pancakes, Whoppers and Burritos!

Whew! What a weekend! Since Doc Sexy and I moved last weekend to "Way Far Away" I have spent way more time in my car than I'd care to remember. But we had to spent A LOT of time in it this weekend.





Saturday morning we had to get up super early, drive 3 hours northeast to drop off the pups at the kennel (we really like our kennel and haven't found a new one yet), DS dropped me off at an audition (which went swimmingly) and then we had to drive another 1/2 hour to my old apartment to change and drive 1 hour west to the resort that my friends were GETTING MARRIED at!! Oh em gee we were in such a hurry to get there on time, we literally sat down and like 5 minutes later the ceremony started, offiicated by.... Cpt. Stoneage. Yeah, talk about a touch awkward considering UJ's recent situations with him. But, seeing as how he is also my friend I wasn't a big ol' meanie, but I did basically avoid him for the first few hours. The ceremony however was lovely and then we went to check in and get our room. OMG, the room. First let me explain that our resort was straight out of Dirty Dancing. Our TV had 3 channels - religion, public television and we think scrambled cartoon porn. The air conditioning unit looked 30 years old and the closet scared me. Plus, we had this door in the bathroom that was locked and we think that Patrick Swayze (rest his soul) was hiding behind there. So, we're sitting in the room and I'm fixing my hair, DS found some weird channel with bear maulings on it and then around 4:30 we were going to wander around. Come to find out there was free beer, wine and soda from 3 til 5.... WTF?! No one told me this shit or I would have been drinking a fuck of a lot sooner! So seeing as how I has put jeans on we went to the room to quick change and then had a few beers outside.



There were tables set up for 8 people in the reception hall. So me, my mom, my sister (Spanky), Doc Sexy were obviously going to sit together. Plus, another friend and her husband (I'll call them.... Cheerleader and The Counter lol.. to be explained later) were going to sit with us since they didn't really know anyone else. That left 2 chairs. Since Cpt. Stoneage knows my family and Cheerleader/The Counter from marrying them I didn't want to be mean and make him sit with random people he didn't know (since he isn't much of a talker to begin with!) and pretty much everyone envited him to sit with us so he made up chair #7 which left an empty one. Well.... to add a bit of a dramatic part to the story I need to make a little sidenote here:



A friend of mine - I don't know if I've nicknamed her before but this time around I'll call her "Oblivious" - is involved with a married man. And without getting into the whole story, since I don't have a month to catch everyone up, I don't agree with it and neither does her friend Cheerleader. We pretty much agree that what Oblivious is doing is wrong and what the man (Adulterer) is doing is disgusting and disrespectful and wrong and many other adjectives. Well Adulterer was coming to the wedding. However, he told his wife that he was going to Doc Sexy's bachelor party. Doc Sexy and I aren't getting married yet that I'm aware of and I told oblivious that I didn't think we needed to be involved in someone lying to their wife. It's a really dramatic situation and apparently I'm the only person who had enough balls to say anything. (Until this weekend... but I'll get to that)



So... Oblivious asked Cheerleader if it was ok that Adulterer sat in our last chair. Seeing as how she can't be mean to Oblivious, she said fine and then ran to come make sure I wouldn't get up and leave the table if he sat down. We discussed how we felt abou the situation and I made it clear that I would keep my mouth shut during dinner but only for the bride and groom's sake but I would under no circumstances be nice to Adulterer if I even spoke to him at all. Well, he didn't make his appearance until like 45 min after we all ate. Which was funny because our table was placing bets on whether he was going to even show up at all. After dinner the bar opened up again and we started drinking.... and drinking and laughing and drinking and laughing and that was how most of the night went on. The Counter got his name because after dinner we saw Adulterer show up and he said "Hey, we should keep track of how many times he leaves to go talk to his wife!" So every time he left the room with his phone our group would yell out the next number!! It was so mean but we kept doing it!! Then they started playing the song the Cupid Shuffle and that made me and Doc Sexy and Cpt. Stoneage BUST out laughing because when we all went to dinner a few weeks ago with UJ we were discussing something and DS named it the Cripple Shuffle. Which sounds really mean taken out of context...and it is kinda mean but really... you had to be there. (I wanted to text you at the time UJ because it was so funny but my phone was all the way in the room and it would have taken me forever to go get it.) So the part of the song that goes "to the left to the left ....to the right to the right..." was added to the list of funny shit that happened that night along with all the Swayze jokes because of the look of the hotel.



Then the garter/bouquet toss came. DS didn't want to participate so he stayed sitting down and The Counter said, "Well dude! This IS supposed to be your bachelor party so you're getting married! You don't have to go up there!!" Which made everyone laugh and DS wrapped a drinking straw around his finger like a wedding ring to add to it. (Let me add here that the more we all had to drink the funnier every little thing became.) Then Oblivious came by and told DS that he should be up there because Adulterer was and Cheerleader (and I love her for this) says "PSH! He ain't single!!" which made Oblivious a little mad so she walked away. And we all high-fived Cheerleader for it! I told her that I had way too many beers in me to be allowed near him because I had no more filter from brain to mouth. More laughing and drinking and dancing and talking and counting (we got up to 8 by the time the reception was over) and then they started emptying the reception hall.



We moved our group outside and were discussing that we all were super hungry since it was 11:30 and dinner was already 5 hours behind us. We started talking about Taco Bell since it was the closest food place (20 min away!) and then DS and I wanted pancakes and then someone mentioned Burger King so our list of food went to Pancakes, Whoppers and Burritos! Then Cpt. Stoneage (who didn't not have any alcohol all night because of the distance of his drive) said that White Castle is usually really good when you're drunk, so we added THAT to the list of food too!! After that I saw Adulterer walk by and I said "Gimme an I, Gimme an N, Gimme an F, Gimme an I, Gimme a D, Gimme an E, Gimme an L, Gimme an I, Gimme a T, Gimme a Y... what's that spell?!" and Spanky says..."Infidelity?!" I said, "I was never a cheerleader, so I'm not so good at that." And Cheerleader says, "Oh! I was! GIMME AN I!" super super loud and then she put her hand over her mouth and we all started laughing again because Adulterer was literally 5 feet from us. Then DS was telling a story about an old crazy neighbor of ours and said something about an accelerant and Cheerleader thought he said "eating celery" so we made a ten minute joke about celery being a drug! (This is what happens when you have 4 drunk people together kids... trouble I tell ya!) We were about to go to our rooms and The Counter and Cpt. Stoneage shook Doc Sexy's hand and said, "Thanks for inviting me to your bachelor party man, it was fun!" Then Cheerleader and The Counter came to our room cuz we were going to TRY to order a pizza. That didn't work so well since every pizza place either didn't deliver that far out or was closed. The bride's friend came back with BurgerShots from Burger King for everyone so we all gathered in one room to eat a few and then go back up to bed around 2.



About 3 am I hear some really weird, loud noise so I got up and walked around our room first thinking that it was the air conditioning because there was a note saying it might freeze up (omg...really?!) but it wasn't coming from the a/c. I walked around the room more and had no idea where it was coming from so I laid back down. A few minutes later I heard people yelling in the hall so I got up and opened the door. There was a weird fog/haze in the whole hallway of the 2nd floor where we were and the people across the hall were packing and going outside. IT WAS THE FIRE ALARM!! So I woke up everyone in my room by turning on the light and yelling "That's the fire alarm...GET OUT!" My mom and Spanky went right outside, I grabbed cell phones and DS and I went downstairs and were looking around to see what was going on. My mom had woken Cheerleader and The Counter up so they would go outside too and everyone finally made it out of the building. We stood outside for awhile and I ran over to the main building of the hotel hoping someone was working there. The whole building was locked and no one was there... at all. So about 3:30 the first squad car showed up with the first fire truck and then about 10 minutes last we had 8 fire trucks, 1 ambulance and 2 cop cars. They finally searched the whole building and it turned out that someone had pulled a fire extinguisher off the wall and sprayed it all over the 2nd floor which was what made all the alarms go off and the weird haze. We finally got to bed and then left the hotel in the morning around 8:30 since DS and I had to pick up the puppies before 11. We got back to Way Far away around 1:30 and needed a nap from all the chaos.

Now it's back to homework, school, work and all the other less fun stuff but the wedding was a lot of fun and a nice little break in the monotony.

xoxo
Classy Bitch

Damn the Man

I really can't take this shite. I mean, I know there are people in the world who are just fucked in life. Born with an unimaginable illness, living in a third world country, orphaned, cursed, etc. But I never considered that I might be one of them.

For someone who has always said I "wear my heart on my sleeve" I sure should look into getting at least a see-thru cover for it or something...because this is getting ridiculous. I am a hopeless romantic. Old-school. Vintage. I say "my heart knows me better than I know myself so I'm gonna let it do all the talkin'." Of course, not so severely as to warrant what's happening to me, but in a kind of "I'd rather live in a movie but know that I'm not" type of way.

Everyone can probably say they've had their share of bad relationships. I have too. But the "bad" isn't really the typical of bad. It's horrifyingly beyond stupid/arrogant/annoying/I want to pull my eyelashes out one by one type of bad. I got married when I was young. Clue number one some would say, but I always knew I'd do that. I'm very strange and sometimes that old-school vintage part of me gets carried away. I did it. So the fuck what? Needless to say we got divorced. And as much as it was a brick in the face, I walked away a better person. I'm still walking away from that, but who's to say when you have to be healed? Now I am not just saying this for the sake of the blog, but I was the victim (although I hate that word, I can't find a more fitting one) in that relationship, and so I would think the years that followed would be like an opened door to a world I was missing out on. No regrets, just lessons learned, and I was ready. Right? Right?!

Wrong. Oddly enough, one part of my life that was NEVER important to me started blossoming. And I'm fine with that now. I've come a long way and traveled down a path I though I never would, and I love it 99.9 repeating % of the time. Great. Fantastic. But... the part of my life that has always been a defining aspect of who I feel I am, started to do things that I'm really tempted to just throw a tantrum about at this point. I mean, unfair is unfair and I just can't take much more. Relationship #1 after my divorce was over before it started. I wasn't really attracted to him and he immediately clung to me. Always shoving me up against walls to make and such. You'd think that would be a wonderfully passionate thing, but no, I was not feeling it at all. And we had sex, and that just made me cry for hours. I didn't care, I was going thru this horrible thing emotionally and mentally, and this guy was just getting out of control. I made him sleep on the couch. Then when I told him I wasn't ready he said, "Oh, yeah, that's fine. You were getting a little too attached to me anyways." The next one was with a guy who "wasn't really ready to have a girlfriend" but decided to date me anyways. I didn't necessarily care because I think I was overly happy that I was attracted to him after Mr. Denial. Things were ok. When he was around. He had this thing where he'd disappear for days, a week, maybe more. Then when he decided to call me he'd wonder why the fuck I was upset. Listen asswipe, if that's your thing then 1) you're a douche bag and 2) you should have just told me so I wouldn't freak out. (By this point, I felt like I was in a real relationship, and let me tell you, the things you try to do and the shit you worry about after going thru a divorce...wrecks havoc on you completely.) So that lasted about a year and he has been given the title of worst boyfriend ever. By the end I was so tired of his MIAness that when I met the next boy, I never really ended it. Fucking hell he was never around anyways. Then came The One.

That relationship started like a dream. Started like I had never experienced before. We met, became friends, talked on the phone, blah blah, then he asked me to be his girlfriend. Great. Fantastic. We had epic things in common. I was unbelievably attracted to him. Everything else in my life was going alright, so hey, this must be it right? Right?!

Wrong again. Honestly, he still may very well be The One. But, he's also the Asshole, the Psycho, the Inconsiderate Prick. The Fucker, the Insane, the Stupid, the Macho... the list goes on. I mean for something to be so right, there was probably 2 to 1 bad for every right. After time, it was depressing. I was hurt so often. I cried so much. And after time, one by one everything disappeared until we finally couldn't be together. (Which, by the way, was a very weird thing for me. There's always been some reason... "I don't love you." "I hate you." "I'm an alien." But to have it be purely circumstantial? Seriously weird...and seriously heartbreaking.) That story is far from being a closed book, but that's not the point of this blog (oh my gawd there's more??)...

Not too recently I told CB (oh, so we're executives now? We only use our initials? Cool. Someone get me a secretary and tell him - notice how I said him - to make me some friggin' coffee!) that it was her new goal in life to find me a guy who wasn't a douche bag. A daunting task, yes. But she didn't actually have to do any finding, and it was maybe the next day or so that her friend and I started talking. Fast forward a little and we've had a few dates, he's met my parents, and we've had a few conversations about how we feel and what we want. Blah blahbitty blah. He sends me this long message about how he feels and how he wants to make sure we can "make it work" (seriously, you are 5 years older than me, you don't know any bigger words to use in a phrase?) before we get too attached. I guess that makes sense. We live in different states. Not horrendously far, but far enough to where we're limited to the weekends for, well, anything. Full time job, own place, seems to be smart and not a douche bag. Alright we'll see. Fast forward a little more and one day he says, "As far as I'm concerned, you and I are an official us. We just need to verbally confirm it." Uuuum, ok. Fine by me. I really liked him and it seemed like a welcome break in the insanity. Deep down I knew something would pop up eventually, but still, a welcome break. And I deserved to be happy even though The One was still The Mess, right? Right??!!

WRONG motherfucker. Apparently not. Apparently I just may be one of those people who somehow got placed in a fairly comfortable place but is doomed to have everything but the one thing that truly should mean the most. Cpt. Stoneage, current mess, is starting to become another douche bag in a long line of predecessors. And I am not happy about that. Not. One. FUCKING. Bit. I mean, yeah he's a guy but cooooome ooooooon. How long do I have to do this for? So we have our little Friday night ritual. There is somewhere I go every Friday night and all my friends are there, including one of my very best friends. He has met them all and made a pretty good impression. And for the last 4 weekends, I've had to explain why he wasn't there. Or, look stupid all night because even I didn't know. Or had my night ruined because half way thru I find out he isn't coming and lo and behold, another weekend bites the dust. Two times it was because he fell asleep (once the power went out), once he decided that seeing this band on Saturday was more important than seeing me. This last Friday. Now, here is the topic at hand. (Finally! You stupid twat, finish the damn story so I can move on with my day!)

By 10pm I was starting to have fun. Everyone was there. It was a bittersweet evening (that very best friend I mentioned? It was his last Friday night at this place) and I was trying to be excited that my boyfriend was finally coming out. 11pm, no bf. Midnight, no bf. Now, Cpt. Stoneage is a texter, and texts me thru out the day while he's at work. The last text I got was probably around lunchtime that day. I had since texted him but gotten no response, figuring he had gone home and to sleep, because he needs a nap before the drive and the fun. Or, whatever. By 12:30, my VBF (guess his nickname will be very best friend) said to me, "He's probably on his way." 1am. 2am. Nothing. No text. No phone call. I felt sick (well, I have been sick for almost 2 weeks) and now I was angry and incredibly stressed and it was giving me a headache. So, on VBF's last night, I left an hour early. I couldn't sit there anymore. I mean, WHAT THE FUCK.

Saturday. I wake up and have a text from Cpt. Stoneage from 6:30 that morning saying, again, that he slept straight thru until morning. Now here's where we get the nickname. Apparently, he's too stupid to use a fucking alarm! (Not to mention, one of those other weekends, I had called him, and he TEXTED me back to say he "saw that I called." Are you kidding me?) He was soooo sorry and sooo mad at himself. (Yeah, you fucking should be.) I woke up around 11 or something, and decided to text him back at 1:05. I said, "we need to talk." I called him at 3:27. No answer. Today, sunday. STILL NOTHING. Not a text or a phone call. And I'm not trying him again because I am not at fault here. HE is the one that should be trying to get a hold of me. And the thing is, I can totally picture him not even realizing that I may be mad. What the fuck dude, are you dead? You better fucking be dead. And I'll just bet my life that he still went to that show last night. That stupid fucking band. Bet he'd NEVER sleep thru that.

So, that is my story. Sad but true. And who knows how this is going to end, but I'm just about ready to say FUCK YOU. I make my mistakes, but I never seem to be in such wrong with the bf's. Are you all just complete assholes? I shake my head at all this. Tonight I am going to try and squeeze into my television because my Addams Family double feature DVD is in there. And I'm going to live happily ever after with my Raul Julia Gomez. That's sexy right there.

I could cry that it's not real.